Artie Lange's job safe, according to Sirius XM exec

Contrary to a report on the Web yesterday suggesting that Howard Stern sidekick Artie Lange is marked for a pink slip after his Jan. 2 suicide attempt, a news report airing on Sirius XM’s Howard 100 and Howard 101 channels states that Lange still has a home at the satellite radio provider. “The Perez Hilton report is absolutely false,” Tim Sabean, Senior Vice President of Sirius’ Howard Stern channels, says in a statement that began airing last night and will continue throughout the weekend. “Artie is very much a part of these channels, and we look forward to Artie’s fast recovery and we wish him all the best.” Stern has a dedicated news department — The Howard 100 News — that reports on stories of interest to or involving him. Perez Hilton’s sources claimed Sirius had already informed Stern that Lange would not be back on the air but was waiting for the comic to recover before breaking the news to him.

Police have confirmed that Lange’s mother found him in his Hoboken, NJ apartment last Saturday with nine wounds to his abdominal area from a 13-inch Wolfgang Puck kitchen knife. “At this point, we’ve deemed it to be self-inflicted and attempted suicide,” Hoboken Det. Lt. Mark Competello tells EW. “There’s no criminal investigation.” Lange, who underwent surgery at Jersey City Medical Center, has since been released.

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  • Get A Q

    We are praying for ya, Baby Gorilla!

    • Beiber

      Come back sson Arnie

      • darclyte

        I hope that he finally gets the help he needs. That said, his return to the Howard Stern Show will be EPIC.

    • Kevin

      Artie has become a staple on the show no matter what his issues. The show does seem a littel slow with out him. Bababooee does need to book more guest!

  • Keisa

    Yay!! I have missed him on the show and Howard and Robin just don’t seem the same since he has been gone. Those 3 were like a family on the air, I cannot wait until he comes back. I do dread all of the phone calls and attention that will be paid to this sad event though. It will be hard to talk about anything else for awhile.

    • Maezeppa

      There’s no evidence he will be back. There are more important priorities now.

      • K.A.

        The most important priority is to hire an actual FUNNY comedian this time ’round to take tubbo’s place on the show. Even if he returns, he’ll likely then bail pretty quickly. Working for a living has become too hard for him …. waaah.

    • jamie

      Love to Artie, speedy recovery. To all the haters/negative comments, I feel sorry for you that you need to put such ire out there.

  • Buffy Freak

    I really want Artie to come back…he is so funny plus it means less air time for lame-assed Benjy. But if/when Artie comes back i don’t want the show to focus so much on Artie’s problems…those shows start to sound like on-air therapy sessions.

    • rerun

      Agreed on Benji. Except the Wrap Up show with the pic and Tracy ripping into him. So funny. I think if Artie does return, they will back off on him. Howard seemed shocked by the suicide attempt, even though he’s slowly been killing himself with drugs for years.

  • Tom

    We love Artie, we’re praying for him and his family, and we look forward to his return to the Howard Stern Show.

  • vlynn930

    <3 U Artie!

  • nutjob

    Lange is proof that having rich influential friends/family is more important than talent. He is just a fat male Paris Hilton without the looks but with the family money.

    • Ipokesmot

      Artie didn’t come from money you moron, he use to work on the friggin docks.

    • Edudlufetips1

      are you retarded?

      why would you comment on something you clearly have no clue about?

      artie came from a lower class family. his father was a roofer and mother stay at home.

      he was a longshoreman before his talent landed him a relatively successful showbiz career. everything he has is because of his own singular talent and deserved via hard work.

      you’re a moron.

      • Artie the Magician

        Artie sure is a great magician! He’s kept his “talent and hard work” well hidden away in plain sight for close to a decade now, while taking up space in the studio and collecting an overinflated paycheck from the Howard Stern show. Both his work ethic and his “talent” have been even more hidden away since the Sirius move.

  • dmac2498

    I wonder if this means that Perez Hilton is no longer welcome on the show? And I look forward to hearing what Stern has to say about Perez Hilton on Monday.

  • cosmo

    I am praying for Artie to get the help he needs and return to the airwaves. He is the most generous, lovable and funny guy on the planet.

  • Ross

    Artie has been a great part of the show over the years as Howard said. But a big part of me thinks he is better off not returning to the show for his own health. This would open the door for a replacement and I would have to think after the Breuer stuff it will be fitzsimmons comments?

    Huge dedicated fan and regular guy

    • rerun

      What Breuer stuff?

  • ron woldecke

    um a yea

  • Bill

    Howard Stern is STILL the best reality show ever!!! Get Well Artie!!

  • wow

    Sooo many positive comments!! How refreshing!! Let’s see how lonng the A-hole take to ransack the boards.

    KEEP IT TO YOURSELFS!!
    Fred Norris cue the “Douche” soundbyte

    • Myles

      I SOOO agree with you wow.

      It’s been really sad to see all the hateful energy flowing towrds Artie and the show in general.

      I also agree that the show IS STILL the greatest.

      Life changes and so does Howard and the gamg, but since day 1 at KRock, I’ve been hopelessly addicted and constantly entertained.

      I hope the show never ends and I hope that Artie recovers to a life he deserves…happy…healthy and serene

      Lots of Reiki flowing to my virtual friends, here and on the show and of course to Artie..be well my brother! ahh ok…pal

      • barleycorn

        sorry i think he ruined the show what do you want? he’s the one tried to kill himself don’t hate him but he hates

  • S

    Artie has a heart of gold, is very talented, and I wish him the very best. Can’t wait to hear you back on the air Artie!

    • Heat of Gold?

      Hardly. His form of comedy is cruel, boorish, crude, and rednecked. What talent take to spew anti-gay, racist and/or sexist “jokes” laced with f-bombs throughout? It shows a lack of talent, education, and maturity.

      • Heat of Gold?

        That should read “What talent does it take….”

      • Edudlufetips1

        you must be one of those guys that wished the world was a happy place where no one swore or poked fun at anything.

        there are crude froms of comedy.. you should know that by now. because artie uses the f word i bet you think he’s a bum and because brian regan has a clean act he is a saint. get real man.

        comedy is meant not to be serious. artie does gay jokes…. yet he supports gay rights. artie does racist jokes… yet one of his greatest influences (richard pryor) is black and his boss, who he was a fan of since he was young, is a jew. his great friend on madtv was orlando jones. he’s sexist but thinks sarah silverman is one of the top 5 entertainers today.

        lack of talent? have you heard the HS show? his knowledge, memory, intelligence, and quickness with wit is astounding. he utters tremendously obscure yet accurate analogies almost instantaneously. he did it for 9 years just about every weekday morning for 4-5 hours.

        you’re a hater, that’s fine. just don’t generalize because it makes you look like a moron. most importantly, don’t extrapolate comedy, because it’s just that… comedy.

      • S

        You sound like someone who has never listened to him on Howard.

  • freckles

    good luck artie!!! hope you get better soon…

    • Heart of Gold?

      Edudlufetips1 and S:

      Yes, I HAVE unfortunately been forced to listen to the pathetic non-comedy of Artie. I have a lifetime subscription to Sirius, and have been listening to Stern since 1991. Why because I think Artie’s an untalented ass do you presume that I don’t listen to the show? If generalizing makes someone a moron then I guess that applies to you two.

      How does Artie support gay rights? For example do you remember that he point blank REFUSED to record an apology to the gay community, and lost the cupcake company endorsement for the hatred he spewed toward gays. Words such as f*g and n*gger flow out of his mouth with far too much ease. Howard has even told him to stop dropping f-bombs so much. He’s white trash, and proves it day after day. BTW, lots of people have good memories, but that has nothing to do with possessing comedic talent. Someone with “intelligence” knows basic grammar, something that alludes Artie. Finally, I’m no prude, and don’t have a clue who Brian Regan is. Comedy doesn’t have to be “clean”, but it should be funny. Artie’s act is not funny, and it’s become worse over the years.

      • Steve Ian

        “…Someone with ‘intelligence’ knows basic grammar, something that ALLUDES Artie…” Um, the word you are grasping for is ELUDES. Yikes. That would be instant karma. Take a look at that glass house you’re living in before you through shots at Artie’s intelligence. By the way, Artie is extremely funny. And when someone is recovering from a suicide attempt, it’s probably not the appropriate time to take shots at them. Class up.

      • Not fun, not funny

        Hey Steve, Heart of Gold used the incorrect word, but Artie uses incorrect words on a painfully continual basis. You have to admit he has terrible grammar. Artie’s comedy is mean and angry, and he has no problem taking shots at others. Guess he’s getting some instant karma himself.

  • JB

    Thought Howard & Robin handled it beautifully on Thursday’s show. Obviously, it was tough for them to talk about and tough for fans to listen to. Praying for Artie and hope he finds some sort of happiness and maybe finds the stength to want to make people laugh again.

    • Yup

      It was hard for Howard Stern fans to listen to only because once again the show reverted back to the “Artie Lange” show. Enough already. The HS show has enabled Artie’s bad behavior to be viewed as entertainment for far too long. It’s just all really sad, and Artie should have been canned months/years ago. He’s not fun and he’s not funny.

      • barleycorn

        yup not fun not funny boring now

      • barleycorn

        hard to listen to show anymore with artie on

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